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Waste Basket or Recycling Bin?
The third guideline for making a clear request is being conscious of what we are requesting.
Dr. Marshall Rosenberg states, "Often we are not conscious of what we are requesting when we speak. We talk to others or at them without knowing how to engage in a dialogue with them. We toss out words, using the presence of others as a wastebasket."
Would you rather your words go into the waste basket or the recycling bin?
Waste Basket:
Two friends on their way to a movie are stalled by traffic. The driver huffs, "I have never seen such a short stop light!"
The passenger says nothing. A few minutes pass and the driver again exclaims, "I've never seen such a short stop light!" The passenger offers, "Must be an event in town."
The driver says even louder, "I HAVE NEVER SEEN SUCH A SHORT STOP LIGHT!" The passenger, feeling tense, says, "What do you want me to do about it? Go direct traffic myself?"
Recycle Bin:
Driver: "Wow this traffic is really backed up! I'm nervous we won't make the movie."
Passenger: "Me too, but if we don't make it, we can eat first and go to a later show."
When we dialogue with people the outcome is much more satisfying, just like knowing that what you put in the recycle bin will continue to have a helpful purpose.
Mindful Practice for the Week
This week notice how often you talk to or at people. Try to practice talking with instead. Enjoy your week!
